Monday, July 27, 2009

Transformed

You've changed me
all you have done to me
all that I've been through
all the pain I have felt
the sadness that has taken me
down
all the hurt is gone now it is time
to move
on
finally, I have let everything go
I have forgiven
and I cried many tears to get
rid of the pain
I've been transformed at all levels
in my life
you have been part of it
and I
thank you
because in the depths of my soul
I have found happiness
within myself
in my heart I have found
a spot for me
to live fully and enjoy life
to care about all I care about
and to love fully from
inside and out
I feel a glow in my heart
My mind is clearer than it has
never been
It is all true
I have been transformed
by me
I can see the sun shining
high above
I see the moon glowing
in the darkness of the sky
I feel a glow in my heart
and life is all easy
It is all true
I have been transformed
by me





Sunday, July 19, 2009

My Angel

Marie-Helene, my angel
a woman of truth
a woman of beauty
my love, my life, my existence
you made me smile
you make me cried now
but in my heart you will always, be
even if not in body, I know in spirit
you are and will be for ever
life continues on and I know
you would want me to go on with life
I often speak of you or all the time
everything in my life
brings memories of you
and you still make me smile
and then I feel like crying
you are in my dreams
at times I wish you weren't
I carry your picture in my wallet
and look at it every now and then
but your face is vivid in my mind
and forever engraved in my heart
Your avocado salad was the best
and nobody will ever recreate it, not even
me
there were days when we slept all day
those were our lazy days
I held you in my arms and we talked
only getting out of bed when we had to
I am destroyed, devastated, broken,
shattered, weaken by you
My life is in disarray, without a path
there are no frontiers ahead
nothing to look forward to, only emptiness
I pace from here to there without a destination
I drive aimlessly in no specific direction
I live because I am alive, but not really alive
I don't know what to do with my life
please guide me, tell me where I should go
when, how to get there
why did you leave, when we had just began
you were my beginning and my end
I wish I would be dead, anything would be better
than living without you
I am destroyed, devastated, broken,
shattered & weaken by you
I don't know what to do with my life
please guide me, tell me where I should go
when, how to get there
why did you leave, when we had just began

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Gone

I cried for you
a million tears or more
I cried so much
my fountains are dry
you left me without noticed
just like that and took it all
the love
I wanted from you, all gone now
you even took our little gift
our bundle of joy with you
you left me all by myself
in this world
I wish I could tell you again
how much I love you and want you
how much I miss you, but you know that
all I want now is your spirit in my life
to guide me in this world
where I feel so naked
so alone
I am scared of the future
of life without you
but I know I most go on
even without you
why did you leave?
Now, I most start again
with my shattered life
I will pick up the pieces
when I am ready
it will be a long time
before I let you go
and even though I will never
have you again
I know you will be with me for a while
for as long as I need you
I cried for you
a million tears or more
I cried so much
my fountains are dry
you left me without noticed
and just like that
you were
gone

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Forever in love

I will be forever in love
with you and no one else
you stole my heart
since the first moment
I saw you
you did too, fall for me
at the same time
it took me by surprise
and you too
and forever I will love you
you are the light of my life
the beacon that keeps me afloat
and guides me through the night
you got lost
but found your way
to me
and
I deviated from that life
and continue on another path
without you
but thought of you every day
and wondered many times
what you were doing
now, you are only in my dreams
and we go on with life
in different paths
it doesn't have to be this way
but it is
unless you are willing
to fight
for what you feel
is forever love

Fight

There are two children in life
I am one of them and you are the other
one
we behave like such
we fight back and forth,
we are both hot headed
we both know it
we some times do not think twice
about doing anything
we just go with it and do it
but no one fights
I wish you would fight
for me
for all you say you believe in me
for all the love you say you feel for me
the love you say will never change
We both behave in childish ways
we think we have mature and learnt
but we have not
even at our age, it means nothing
just fight
that is all I want you to do
nothing else and show me
that the love you feel
is
real
I have never asked anything
of you
but I am now
fight for
us
do not be afraid to be loved
just jump and take a chance
what do you got to lose
nothing
I think
I have jumped, swam,
and even when I was drowning
I tried to keep my head up
do not let go
it is easy
to
give
up
but don't
try again and again
till you succeed, unless what you want
is to fail
and wonder for the rest of your
life
what
could have been
fight and never give up on us
and the only thing I ask is
that you fight
for
us





Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Immature

She is a fruit
she has been maturing since
a young age
she has grown, a thing of beauty
her eyes sparkle with her smile
yet, there is a hint
of sadness
in her eyes
she is still growing
and
maturing
but still a bit green
even when she thought
she was mature enough
she was definitely
mistaken
She is a fruit
that needs to be ripe
but in the depths of her core
her heart is getting harder
and harder every time
She has mature
in some ways
her body is divine
her soul is very fine
but there is so much in her
mind
She lives in
another world, her own
where everything is rosy
and everyone gets alone
she dreams
yet she still
sleeping in the depths
of her life
She still hanging from the tree
branch
from which she should
be falling any time soon
as a sign that she
has
grown
but she might remain in the
branch
for a little longer
for yet she still
ripening
but who knows when
the fruit will fall
She is a fruit of beauty
her juices flow from her
heart
yet she is easily
hurt
by the world around
she is naive
she feels incomplete
At times she wishes
to die
for there is no reason
to still be alive
but then someone smiles
and the world seems again
bright
She is a fine fruit
that needs care and hope
but she is still
immature
even though she is grown
At times she wishes
to die
for there is no reason
to still be alive
but then again
it is all
in her mind

Monday, July 6, 2009

Good-Bye

I thought about you
very often, since we parted last
every day if I may
I had the picture of your face
in my head, every minute,
every second of the day,
since you left me some time ago
I wished for you to come back, for so long,
I hoped and I dreamt
but you never came back
today, there is only a glimmer
a hint of your face in my brain
I try to recreate what you
look like but I can't
what your lips felt like
the colour of your skin on mine
whether or not your arms
were strong, I am sure they were
I want to see your smile
in my head and I try ever so hard
it hurts even to try
the only thing I remember of you
is the colour of your eyes
and your cat eye
and still feel all the love
inside that I once
felt for you
it has faded since a long time
and all I wish for you
is happiness and much love
but it will have never work for us
even when I know
I could have loved you
for the rest of
of my life
but I must go on
with my life
without you
so I must say to you
Good-Bye

Violin Girl

She is out there
she is loud,
she likes to have fun
she laughs at loud
and does not care
there is music in her head
all the time
her hair is ruby red
her lips cherry crimson
her eyes sparkle like the stars
and she dances with the wind
at times she wears
her cha cha skirt
or simply her scarlet sexy dress
and definitely turns men and women's
heads and all eyes on her;
she plays the violin with her heart
while the music flows from her heart
and every note means something to her
even if not to those around,
she lives life to the fullest
taking a chance here and there
without much care
she might get hurt but moves on,
she is a friend, she is a musician
but overall she is
a human being
who makes everyone laugh
she is a friend
who listens and gives advice, when ask,
and if need be
she will dance salsa
to make you smile
she is a friend, she is a musician
but overall she is
a human being
her name is Christina
who we love
just the way she is

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Empty Words

Words that flew into the wind
they were written without much thought
or feeling, her guess
when time came to show the truth
it was too much and too good
to be true
she believed in him and in his words
what a fool
she tells herself, but it is time to move on
finally
the last words have been written
and spoken
she wrote from the heart
he not from his
but from a place so detached from it
all and life itself
he expressed words of "love"
but not the meaning of it,
love that is
false, untrue, uninspired
she believed every word
and gave him
another chance
just to be stabbed in the back
while she was asleep
enthrall on the dreams of her night
together but apart
she opened
her mind and her heart
many times
she trusted him completely
as always
she went in with reservations
and many questions
but only got one answer
he had never
changed, even when
he said he had
it was all
a lie
she waited forever
years, months, days
weeks, hours, minutes
seconds went by
while he was sleeping
he never wanted
to drink from her cup
she had moved on with her
life
but he came back
he made her wait
just to crash
her life again with
his empty
words






Thursday, July 2, 2009

Waited

I waited forever
but moved on while you were gone
days, months, years, minutes, hours,
seconds went by while you were awake

but you never noticed the time passing by

until it was too late;

many questions I have and reservations too
but who would blame me, I hope not you

I am hesitant to jump
into the depths of this ocean
that has appeared before me
and
that I have not swam in a very long time
I am tasting the waters
and enjoying the scenery
without jumping
completely,
I just need answers to my questions

for all of it to be put at rest

so that we continue our lives

the way it was supposed to be

You loved me, loved me not

loved me, loved me not
you love me today
but what about tomorrow?
I want you in my life
with all the might in my heart
but,
I am hesitant to jump
into the depths of this ocean
that has appeared before me

and
that I have not swam
in a very long time

I am tasting the waters
and enjoying the scenery
without jumping
completely
give me time and the answers I need

so that we can drink from the same cup
today and all the days waiting ahead
here and now
give me all the love you have
and that you have not given me

all this time,
I've been waiting forever
let me wait no more
give me all the love
that you have inside
I want to love you
every minute, every hour
every second of the day
and forever if I may